Andy Burnham is on holiday with his trotters up. It's what you do when you finally get your dream job. Bunk off.

17:08, Tue, Aug 4, 2026 Updated: 17:08, Tue, Aug 4, 2026

Andy-Burnham-holiday

Andy Burnham's off on his hols - and look what he's left behind (Image: Getty)

Well, it’s what our new PM has done. Happily, he's left behind a trail of unfunded spending pledges and a string of TikTok videos to amuse us in his absence. but I understand he needs a break. He’s had a lot to absorb, having come from nowhere to foment a revolt against his boss and install himself in Downing Street without a vote. You’d need a holiday too. It may not be the best look leaving a convicted fraudster in charge of the country, in the shape of Louise Haigh. But it could be worse. He could have left us in the hands of Ed Miliband.

He's only away for a week, while assuring us he's prepared to come back if needed. Say, if his Instagram starts shedding followers. Or the country needs an emergency tweet. In his absence, we can at least admire Labour's talent pool. The aforementioned 'Lou' Haigh is now the power behind the throne, although Number 10 insists she won't be taking day-to-day decisions in Burnham's absence. Let's hope nobody is.

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I don't know whether Burnham is good at making prime ministerial decisions yet. Nobody does. But I wouldn't trust the rest of them. The Labour talent pool is shockingly thin. The party has 401 MPs, and not one of them was considered up to the job. Most of them belong in a rogues gallery, rather than parliament.

Labour is supposed to be a moral crusade but the list of recent scandals is long. Remember homelessness minister Rushanara Ali, who resigned after it turned out she’d made her tenants homeless, so that she could hike the rent on her east London townhouse by £700 a month. Or Angela Rayner, who handed Rachel Reeves a shopping list of tax rises while being found "careless" with her own tax affairs.

Then there was former anti-corruption minister Tulip Siddiq, who resigned over alleged financial links to figures connected to Bangladesh's former regime. Or former health minister Andrew Gwynne, sacked after messages emerged in which he said he hoped a pensioner who didn't support him would die before the next election, alongside a string of sexist and racist remarks.

They've all gone. Yet somehow Diane Abbott is back, presumably to prove Labour is now a broad church under Burnham. Broad enough to include MPs who have repeatedly backs Vladimir Putin over Ukraine.

Burnham has made Lucy Powell education secretary. Her first move was to blame Tory Michael Gove for today's youth worklessness crisis. Never mind that more than 1 million young people are struggling to find work because Rachel Reeves made employing them more expensive. Apparently, it's all Gove's fault for making them too clever.

We've also had the spectacle of new chancellor John Healey warning retailers against price gouging while admitting he has no evidence they're doing it. The only gouging I can see is coming from Labour's endless tax hikes. Ed Miliband has gone quiet. I hope he stays that way. Lisa Nandy seems to have vanished altogether. Report suggest she's having a big salt because she didn't get the job she wanted.

The left is already sharpening its knives. It wants Burnham to take on Donald Trump, reopen the Brexit wars, grovel over Gaza, and ignore the bond market to tax and spend like crazy.

I like Andy Burnham. I'd like to believe him when he says he can replace division with calmer, more inclusive politics. But first he'll have to bring his own side into line. That won't be easy. Leftie columnist Owen Jones was crying betrayal within days of Burnham becoming PM. Plenty more will follow. He's like the first cuckoo offspring. That will be more.

I hope Burnham enjoys his holiday and comes back refreshed. Because he’s got a massive fight on his hands. Not with the Conservatives or Reform. But with Labour. Unless he can keep them in line, he's finished.